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30 January 2016

Post 8

I use to think that heartaches in TV shows and dramas are just an act, it's not reality. I always question the possibility for someone to be so heart broken. I didn't understand girls who would give everything for the person they love. I always think it is impossible for someone to be so in love with a person. I never understand how can a person still continue to love a person with all the flaws and pain they cause. I used to call a girl dumb and stupid for staying with a person who is obviously not treating her right. I always confront those who come to me, telling me they can't let their ex go. Now, I understand and know that it is all possible since the day I love you.

27 January 2016

Post 7

I'll just look at your picture as long as my heart desires. No one will know and nobody cares. Then, I'll just feel sad and cry myself to sleep.

Post 6

I give you my heart.
No, no! Keep it for someone special. I don't want your heart. Don't give it to me.

25 January 2016

Post 5

Woke up this morning feeling weird. Feeling not in the mood for anything. Something is not right. As if I missed something. Something bad is going to happen. As if I'm going to be in trouble. The feeling that there is going to be damage done towards my car. Bad aura. Don't feel like being nice. It feels like nothing good is coming out today. Ugh.... What's the reason for these feeling????

24 January 2016

Post 4

I miss you. I really do miss you. I miss seeing you. I miss talking to you. I miss your smile. I miss your laughter. I miss taking you out for meals. I miss giving you gifts. You texted me four days ago and tell me that you miss me. I'm almost done packing my love for you and keeping it in the corner of my heart. Now the feelings are slowly back again. Each morning I wake up, you are the first I see in my mind and the last before I go to sleep. Where do I start this time to let you go once again. How to kill this hope that is blooming again. I'll never get you the way I love you and it hurts.

22 January 2016

Post 3

I'm done with IDK. IDK how to react to IDK anymore. I don't want to reply to IDK. I'm done. I'm done. I'm done.  But I still heart you and will still choose to reply. Always.

21 January 2016

Post 2

I have prepared myself to accept the fact that I am never going to get a call or a text from you after I said goodbye on 7 December 2015. We were never together but it felt like a breakup when we stopped texting. You texted on Christmas and thank me for the presents. I replied and kept the conversation short. I was afraid. Afraid that I'll run back to you. It's not like I have managed to move away from you. I know you have never love me, you told me when I asked if you had feelings for me. However, deep deep down, deep deep down I can't remove the feeling that you do love me. I hope that you would text on new year but the wish never arrived. I wished you happy new year on a social app that you have deleted. I told you that I miss you also on the same social app. I want you to know that I miss you and I still love you but at the same time I'm afraid too. As long as you do not reinstall that app, there is where all my I miss you and I love you messages will be send to. A million times my heart persuaded me to type 'hello' in our chat box but I know I should not. It's time to seriously move on. Then, yesterday, you texted me. My heart was filled with excitement. You said that you miss me. I could only say hahaha when what I really really wanted to say was I miss you too. I kept the conversation short too. I'm sorry. I'm really afraid. Afraid that I'll run back to you. The heart wants what the heart wants. I doubt that I'll ever stop loving you, but it's over now. I got to let you go.

12 January 2016

Post 1

I feel uneasy. I feel uncomfortable. Spiritually uncomfortable. Emotional uncomfortable. I feel angry. I feel aimless, hopeless, useless. I feel messed up. I feel unloved. I feel tired. Tired of life. Tired of work. Tired of everything. I don't see the light. I can't find purpose. I have lose my passion. No motivation, no drive, no encouragement. Life is meaningless. Life is empty. No dreams, ambitions or goals anymore. Materials goals are just things to do. No happiness, joy or laughter. Just Emptiness.