The cold wind blows into the house.
The rain pours slowly down from the sky.
Will it happen tonight?
A young girl waiting, standing by.
In red with golden sparkles by her side.
Will he come tonight?
Busy machine zooming left and right.
When will they stop so he can pass by.
Will she see him tonight?
Alas, time passed by so fast.
The rain stops, the pain starts.
She never gets to see him tonight.
There is a longing to express what I feel.
I'm here wondering, pondering and questioning.
Being confuse with these feelings can be so irritating.
Is it love? Longing to be with the one you desire?
Is it jealousy? Knowing that 'I'm not the only one'
Is it boredom? What should I do next?
Is it uneasiness? What will happen in the future?
Being human. These are some of the feelings that everyone and each one of us face everyday.
I caught myself starring at one of my whatapps contact just now. Well, basically I wanted to start a conversation with someone but I don't know how to start it. It is so easy to start a conversation with someone you don't feel anything for and the conversation can go on forever.
The moment I fall for someone, I realised that I'll run out of topics to talk about but I want to talk to you, I need to talk to you, but what should I say.... It is frustrating to receive one word replies..... Arrggghhhh....
Have you ever thought about what will become of your life in just a short period of 5 years?
Well, I do think of the 5 year. However, most of the time it would be about the 5 years past not the future 5 years.
My life have definitely been different for the past 5 years. First of all, this year 2015 is officially my 3rd complete cycle of being a teacher.
I remember in the year 2012 when I was posted back hometown. I always wonder, 🎵~I wonder how, I wonder why~🎶 Lol.... Hahhaha....
I always wonder if I will turn into a teacher that is not relevant to her students😨, or a teacher that always seems to be lost not knowing what is happening to her world.😑 Worst still..... A teacher with mood swing.... 😤
Till now... I still don't know what type of a teacher I am. Do I terrify the students I teach ? Do they gossip behind me?
I find it hard to be the real me sometimes just to be honest. Can't run from people who judge.
Anyway, this is just a random post. Thanks for reading.
These past few months had been a roller coaster ride for me with work loads not coming in one after another but at the same time. Man! I was counting down the days till everything was over.
Physically, I was tired, exhausted and almost at the point of breaking down. However, as usual God is faithful. He gave me the strength.
Talking about making things worst. I realised that I had fallen in love. Lol... How in the world did that person managed to steal my heart amongst my hectic schedule. Salut! Salut! Alas, I recognised that is wasn't a right relationship to commit myself into. It was freaking hard to fall out of love.... Up till now I'm still... Haiz....
With hormones raging and trying to mentally focus on my work... Everything was just so overwhelming. I thank God for giving me the passion to sing.
In the mist of all.... The song running after you by planetshakers spoke to me clearly. "and even though sometimes Your way I cannot understand. I'll never walk away because my future's in Your hand"
Tears started flowing down. I'm convicted that God spoke to me through the song. I could feel His presence in the car with me.
Indeed, I serve a mighty God. All I did was to seek Him.